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A Whole New Ball Game

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Our future is like a blank canvas that invites our masterstrokes of imagination. Problems remain problems until such time that we decide to solve them. It is our decision to solve a particular set of problems that turns them into a challenge. Most managers seek recognition and reward for what they have accomplished. And this is only natural. However, is it not the challenges they set out to overcome in the first place that truly merit our admiration? There is no dearth of problems at work and in society. Our stature in business and in life is directly proportionate to the challenges we choose to overcome. If it wasn’t for Goliath, who would know of David today?

We need truly massive challenges to contribute value and grow ourselves and our business. This reminds me of a poignant message in a Mercedes ad which I recently saw in a business magazine: “Press your foot firmly on the throat of mediocrity!” What is very evident is that managers generally settle for dealing with small issues rather than tackling the difficult ones. This could either be due to their lack of capacity or them being risk averse or a bit of both. Back in 2005, Imaad Rizvi embarked on a journey to become a driver for A1 Team Pakistan, so that one day, he could join the ranks of Adam Khan and others to lend further strength to our country’s first ever venture into the world stage of motorsports. At the time, Pakistan secured 10th position overall in round one of the inaugural ‘A1 Grand Prix’ race held at Brands Hatch.

This was the first World Cup in the history of motorsports. Hats off to Arif Husain, the then chairman of A1 Team Pakistan and also to our key national sponsors that included Warid, PIA, PSO, GEO et al. They did a great service in bringing Pakistan to the centre stage of one of the most admired sports in the world. What I learned from Imaad was that a millisecond determined the difference between a good and a great driver. And attaining this level of precision was an arduous journey. As a case in point, Pakistan was in 4th position in the early laps at Brands Hatch. A minor delay of a few seconds in the pit-stop pushed us back to 13th position. At first Imaad had described his training as stressful. However, later, with the passage of only a few months of races in places like Silverstone, UK and at the Bahrain International Circuit, he found the rigor involved, therapeutic and calming. He now relishes the prospect of taking on bigger challenges. This has become his passion. His new found confidence gained from his stint in the world of motorsports is serving him well today – almost seven years later, in his career at United Way – the largest NGO in Canada. The very thought of climbing great heights, and that too, effortlessly is counterintuitive.

Imagine going for the proverbial big leap in your own context. As a manager, achieving significant results in increasingly tough times is crucial for you. This could be in terms of increased sales, bigger production targets, improving quality of products or services, raising capital, restructuring or devising new strategies for growth. Such endeavors can cause immense stress. Embracing meaningful challenges need not be a traumatic experience! It’s fun, when you love what you do and actually enjoy the process without, of course, wanting to prove anything to anyone. Performing in challenging circumstances is a source of energy and immense motivation for the young and the not so young! There are a number of inspiring examples of leaders who have achieved what seemed impossible, without necessarily, losing sleep over it.

Of course, in the beginning, even contemplating a daring strategy can be scary. Quite a few heads of companies in the fast-growing telecoms, pharmaceutical and energy sectors will bear me out. Daring to accomplish hair-raising goals is seen and felt more as a romantic notion, rather than a practical proposition. “Too much is at stake”, “what if this audacious plan backfires,” “Better to be safe than sorry”. Such sentiments come out of our innate desire to feel secure in the world of the ‘known’. Whereas, our work involves dabbling with the future – the great imponderable that is mysterious and frightening.

Our job as managers and leaders has a lot to do with setting direction and aligning human capacity to implement demanding strategies within tight policy, time and budgetary constraints. We fail miserably when we lack decisiveness by failing to make to make the infinite choices available to us. Creative and innovative thinking are needed in all those who lead their organizations through uncharted territories. Taking control of a situation, leading from the front and displaying courage with integrity, in complex situations, can be extremely stressful and scary for many – but this need not be, if we realize that our fears stem from our paradigms – the rules by which we interpret reality. The real challenge is not outside of us – it is within us! We can change the way we see our world and hence change our reality. By doing so, climbing the Everest can be more like scrolling in the park! Of the two main functions in our brain – memory and imagination, sadly many of us are trapped by ‘memory’ – the ‘known’ – a place where our beliefs also reside. Some of these beliefs can be debilitating, while others empower. We need keep the beliefs that serve our purpose, and dump the rest, while using our faculty of imagination to the full.

Our future is like a blank canvas that invites our masterstrokes of imagination. When we view problems as stepping stones to professional and personal greatness, they become a whole new ball game!

Go With The Flow

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Lack of focus is undoubtedly one of the lethal performance killers. Workplace surveys reflect that a scarily large number of employees are usually disengaged primarily due to a foggy, stressed or wandering mind which compromises performance. It takes a mighty effort to shun away all the distractions (both physical & emotional) and concentrate all energies on the task at hand.

I have been struggling with focus myself for a quite a while. I am always on the lookout for some inspiring material on this subject, and recently came across an incredible book on Focus by Daniel Goleman. Thanks to my colleague (Asif) for recommending this book. A brilliant read on the anatomy & dynamics of focus. This article encapsulates highlights from the subject book.

Disengagement at work can be associated to a whole range of factors such as low motivation, lack of challenge, inadequate financial tradeoffs, a discouraging boss, workload , constant stream of technological teasers ( buzz of a mobile or ‘bing’ of a new mail).

According to brain science, the primary reason of disengagement is absence of “FLOW”. People are rarely in flow in their daily lives. They are mostly stressed or bored. Research shows that 20 % people have a ‘flow ‘ moment at least once a day. Around 15 % of people never enter ‘flow’.

What is “FLOW”? Just like music, flow is a state of harmony. A melody is created and music flows when different instruments are in sync. Similarly, flow is a state of neural harmony, a rich, well timed connection between diverse brain areas. There are two vital parts of the brain, the top down and bottom up, When these parts are in sync, we are more likely to perform at our best. It results in high engagement, a state of full absorption; we enjoy carrying out the tasks and feel good about it. Pleasure is the emotional marker of flow.

To understand the dynamics of flow, we need to take a closer look at the two drivers of our mind. Our brain has two semi independent, largely separate operating systems. The ancient brain is called bottom up mind, whereas the relatively modern brain. which has evolved over the centuries, is called top down brain. Both play a phenomenal role in defining who we are and how we operate.

The Bottom Up Brain or Narrative Brain

• This fast and furious part of our brain works like a flash, operates in milliseconds
• it is involuntary and automatic, never sleeps , may dose off for a while though
• It forms intuition through a network of neural associations
• Highly impulsive in nature and is driven by emotions
• This part of the brain fathers all our habits and is usually change averse

Top Down Brain – Direct Experience

• It has evolved over a period of time, flexible and reflective
• It has limited capacity and consumes a lot of energy to operate, no wonder a focused task leaves us exhausted and drained out
• It is voluntary and effortful
• This is the seat of self control and has the tendency to overpower and challenge old habits and emotionally driven impulses
• It is a willing learner, capable of making new neural connections

Power of choice, will power & voluntary attention are top down functions whereas bottom up brain is reflexive and routine driven.
The bottom –up brain has immense storage capacity, it multitasks and scans our surrounding without being told to do so. It is a collector, always on the lookout to gather and store information. The top down brain takes time to deliberate on what is presented by the bottom up brain. Its job is to bring some method to the madness.

Full focus is achieved when both parts of the brain are active. For instance, creative problem solving is a function of harmonious blend of top down and bottom up activity. Think through a problem logically and methodically and then let your mind adrift for a while as you stumble on an impasse. Let your mind wander a bit, break away from the routine and let the unconscious automated bottom up brain to dig out an insightful and creative solution.

The happy marriage between both parts of our brain enables us to realize our full potential and enhance our performance. A collision between both brains is a recipe for disaster as it creates confusion, conflict and chaos in our thought process causing dissonance.

Employee Engagement can be stimulated through motivation, challenge and most importantly by evoking a sense of purpose which will lead to flow, a state of harmony between our creative energies and rational navigators.

An employee dwelling in his comfort zone due to lack of challenge, fear or de-motivation, easily succumbs to distractions and ends up wrestling with focus issues. S/he barely get to enjoy the magical moments of ‘flow’, which act as catapult that hurl you to fly higher & faster.

Office environment can play an instrumental role in employee engagement by promoting a high performance culture which ignites both parts of the brains; challenge , pressure and sense of accomplishment involves top down thinking while motivation & positive reinforcement keeps the door open for bottom up traffic such as creativity and the value of a mind adrift.

“The intuitive mind is a sacred gift and the rational mind is a faithful servant. We have created a society that honors the servant and has forgotten the gift.” Attributed to Albert Einstein

Seeing Things Anew

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“Enhancing awareness doesn’t require a search-and-destroy mission against our internal fears or judgments. It only requires recognizing and acknowledging them.”

Source: “Presence”, a book by Peter Senge, C. Otto Scharmer,
Joseph Jaworski & Betty Sue Flowers

Only when we learn to see the ‘new’, in the ‘old’ will we arrive at a better understanding of the challenges we face in business, in society and elsewhere. I realized this when I moved to Vancouver BC, Canada, back in 2006. I was there for a couple years. It was an opportunity for me to learn, grow and explore OD consulting practices in North America. This was a big change for me as I had never lived in this part of the world before.

We rarely, individually or collectively, stop to think about the meaning and significance behind what we are observing and experiencing. Instead, we tend to react habitually to situations we face at work and in life. How most heads of states and institutions are responding to the prevailing global issues is a case in point. Today, we are witnessing degradation of our environment; the ever-growing social divide between the rich and poor; a global economic crisis; the potential dangers arising from biotechnology; and increasing ethnic and sectarian violence around the world. Can such unfolding events teach us something of value? They can, but only if we are willing to suspend judgment and reflect on what we ‘see’ carefully, and that too, with an open mind – free of bias.

While Canada is the same old world, how it works struck me as refreshingly new. Of the many new experiences, I would like to share the seemingly mundane example of public transport in Vancouver BC with you. Out there, as in Pakistan, people go about their daily business, but in very different ways. Regularity, predictability, courtesy, and precision are a norm. Even though I didn’t know my ways around the city, this fact posed no problem. For example, whenever I needed to go somewhere, I put a call to Translink (Vancouver BC’s public transport system). A very helpful agent always responded and enquired politely, “Where would you like to go; what time would you like to reach your destination; and where do you intend to start your journey from?” As soon as I conveyed the required information, I was given a detailed route plan – the train to catch – from where, and at what time; the bus number to take on arrival; time and location from where it departs; and the nearest spot to my destination at which to disembark. I ended up knowing my way from here to there in less than five minutes! And this convenience was available to all in this city. Relevant information was easily accessible on phone or the net. It made all the difference and was truly liberating.

Pakistan is a different ball game. Traveling in any of its major cities is convenient only for the few who have their own means of transport, although traffic and road conditions can be challenging at the best of times. The silent majority have to rely on public transport that is very unreliable and unsafe – an uphill task for the millions, every day, to make it safely and on time, from point A to B.

Reasons for this stark contrast appear to be self-evident at first. ‘Economics’… ‘Education’… I hear you say. But please suspend judgment. Pause. Reflect. Think deeper. The reasons for the stark differences are not necessarily the ones that come to our mind habitually.

We desperately need to enhance our awareness, by seeing and perceiving the situation afresh. In practice, this requires patience and a willingness not to impose our preconceived notions on what we are seeing. In the book, ‘Presence’ (page 31) an example is provided from when the economist Brian Arthur and his colleague, the sociologist Geoffrey McNicoll, were working in Bangladesh in the 1970s. “They spent months observing, gathering information, and ‘doing nothing.’ This was at a time when it was common for Western economists and institutions such as the World Bank to analyze needs of developing countries such as Bangladesh by simply applying traditional economic models without really questioning them. Eventually, Arthur and McNicoll developed a fresh understanding of how the ‘whole’ functioned. They showed how conditions such as landlessness and large families were self-reinforcing over time and how standard ‘band-aid’ fixes prescribed by international aid institutions only served to prop up the status quo.” This perspective helped shift focus of these institutions.

It might be worth asking why it is so difficult for us to change our attitudes and paradigms to seeing and understanding age-old problems we face in our businesses and in society. According to the authors of ‘Presence’ not being able to ‘see’ problems for what they are is universal. “Most change initiatives that end up going nowhere don’t fail because they lack grand visions and noble intentions. They fail because people can’t see the reality they face. Likewise, studies of corporate mortality show that most Fortune 500 companies fail to outlast a few generations of management not because of resource constraints, but because they are unable to ‘see’ the threats they face and the imperative to change.”

Just over a century ago, educated men came up with the concept of airships (like the famous Zeppelin). At the time experts could only ‘see’ lighter than air devices fly. Thank God, soon after, some people ‘saw’ otherwise, and we now have jet aircraft weighing over 600 tons, that are much faster and safer, connecting people all over the world. This possibility always existed. It was only when we ‘saw’ it through deeper awareness that jet planes and supersonics became reality. Many more breakthroughs in medicine, social justice, governance, communications etc., are hidden in nature’s infinite store of possibilities.

Consider this: It is the job of public servants to serve. Elected representatives come into office with the intent to serve the very people they were elected by. Wouldn’t it be nice, if our politicians simply passed a bill in parliament, making it mandatory for all government officials and their families to use the railways for domestic transport, use government run hospitals for all their healthcare needs, and send their children to government schools, colleges and universities for primary and higher education? Imagine the positive change this would make.

Status quo will prevail unless we learn to ‘see’ our old world with a new set of eyes.

Balancing Two Extremes

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“The line between firmness and harshness, between strong leadership and bullying, between discipline and [rigidity] – is a fine one.  It is difficult to define, but those of us who are professionals and also have accepted as a career the leadership of men, must find that line.”

General Melvin Zais, US Army

Much of the literature on change and transformation talks about maximizing employee and stakeholder participation through engagement. While this is true, it is necessary to bear in mind some important caveats. In certain circumstances or times – invariably in urgent or crisis situations – leaders have to lead, and people simply have to do what they are told and follow orders. The fundamental point is to know exactly when to direct, and when to dialogue. This calls for balancing the two extremes of leadership styles – the ‘telling’ versus the empowered approaches.

In a recent team engagement session I conducted for an oil and gas company, its CFO shared the following illuminating piece. It was an extract from an article by General Melvin Zais of the US army:

“The day I assumed command of this division I enjoined the leaders to take care of their men. I have reiterated this statement many times since then. Even so, I again find it necessary to call this matter to your attention. Taking care of your men includes food, shelter, pay, clothing, mail and recreation, but even more important is your attitude.

  • You cannot expect a soldier to be a proud soldier if you humiliate him.
  • You cannot expect him to be brave if you abuse him.
  • You cannot expect him to be strong if you break him.
  • You cannot ask for respect and obedience and willingness to assault hot landing zones, climb up back-breaking ridges or destroy dug-in emplacements if your soldier has not been treated with the respect and dignity which fosters unit spirit and personal pride.

The line between firmness and harshness, between strong leadership and bullying, between discipline and [rigidity] – is a fine one.  It is difficult to define, but those of us who are professionals and also have accepted as a career the leadership of men, must find that line.  It is because judgements and people and human relationships are involved in leadership that only men can lead men, and not computers.

I enjoin you to be ever alert to the pitfalls of too much authority.  For the very junior leader beware that you do not fall in the category of the little man with a little job and with a big head.  In essence, be considerate.  Treat your subordinates right and they will literally die for you”.

One thing is clear, that both the directive and empowering styles of leadership are appropriate in change management – but in different contexts, and for different reasons and purposes. It is accepted the world over that embracing change is absolutely vital for the success of all organizations. Yet, why is it that change programs often fail to meet desired goals? Need for research into the success factors and causes of failure in change programs has never been greater.

Happily, most new ideas and trends in change management are not rocket science. However, they merit serious consideration as we grapple with the demands posed by the 21st century. N. Machiavelli captures the essence of the challenge thus: “There is no more delicate matter to take in hand, nor more dangerous to conduct, nor more doubtful in its success, than to be a leader in the introduction of changes. For he, who innovates, will have for enemies all those who are well off under the old order of things, and only lukewarm supporters in those who might be better off under the new.”

Nature abhors status quo. Change has been with us since the beginning of time and will endure. The least we can do is to keep ourselves abreast with the unfolding realities in our business and socio-economic environment and adapt accordingly, or simply perish. Ideally, we should be able to read the trends in our respective industries and markets and try to stay ahead of the game.

How individuals and organizations respond to the challenges of sustaining growth will vary significantly. For example, a small organization may want to expand into new markets by opening a local sales office overseas as part of its strategy. On the other hand, a large multinational may decide to centralize or consolidate certain operations into a single location. Some may want to switch from a national brand and attempt to create a single global brand, while others may favor creation of global business units with regional operations. Such strategic considerations will involve plenty of management time gathering and analyzing relevant data; considering the pros and cons of each alternative; and working out ways that will make the needed organization-wide changes effective.

Competitive pressures, organizational life-cycle, internal succession, technology, geo-politics, regulation & deregulation, and market expectations continue to be dynamic, forcing organizations to continuously renew and revitalize themselves. This requires constant unlearning and re-learning – something most managers understand at an intellectual level, but have difficulty practicing in real life.

In one of your future meetings, ask your managers, “Do people need to change?” Invariably all hands will go up, signifying a resounding “Yes”! Then ask a follow-up question, “Do you need to change?” And notice the pause and silence, before hands go up slowly and reluctantly. It’s easy to point fingers at others. It’s high time we learned to look within ourselves.

“Things” change only if people change. And people only change if they see the world differently. This implies the need for continuous personal development. The essential truth is that you cannot force people to change; they have to want to change.

In light of the above, the challenge for leadership in organizations is to take their people through some form of an interactive process that enables them to understand what is happening within and around their organization. This helps them to draw their own conclusions about the implications and options in change. Such programs need to take place at all levels – those of the individual, team and the organization.

Everyone needs to get involved and engaged in the debate about future directions and change. Through such an approach we mobilize energy for change through joint diagnosis of business problems and collective search for possible solutions. Organizations like United Energy Pakistan, Engro Corp and Karachi Electric Supply Co (KESC), and many others, are successfully managing change by following such a participative strategy. The good news is that major local companies in Pakistan are also joining the foray.

We need to keep in mind a growing social trend worldwide, that of the increasing importance and power of the individuals. The implications for change are profound. In every area of change, there is an increasing awareness of the need to treat people as individuals – understanding, respecting, valuing and working within the sphere of the individual. This requires considerable amounts of time for understanding, planning, tolerance, and flexibility. We need to get wiser at change by understanding its complexities and subtleties, and adopt more practical and relevant approaches to it.

In other words, we need to consider an integrative approach. It makes sense, but produces some difficult choices for those charged with bringing change. There are strong, positive benefits for organizations that adopt a broader approach. However, the downside is the amount of discussion and debate that is required to consolidate differing views and perspectives on issues.

By the balancing the two extremes we can not only create a buy-in of all key stakeholders, but can also drastically reduce the time to implement agreed plans and strategies as there will be much less resistance and fewer surprises during execution.

Be or Die

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In the tide and storm of information we are blasted with daily, the ability to steer confidently toward ones goal is quite a feat. Even when one wants nothing to do with the television, there is someone at home who is watching and the sound gets caught. With the so-called educated (at least graduate) politicians yelling and even louder program hosts, the viewer is left ambivalently stunned between ridicule and hope. At work, there is a general disgruntlement with bodies coming to do a job; in social circles the hot topics are more of what the media is blaring; at public service offices there is clamoring for means to get more out of those that are served. Ride in a public bus and you are lucky to get a place on the roof; use a rickshaw or taxi and be prepared to pay through your nose; visit a police station to file a complaint and witness atrocities committed on the evil and innocent alike; stop at a traffic light and get inundated by beggars or blared by horns urging you to break the light, or even get robbed; go to a government hospital and behold enough sights to shock you forever.

Two questions come to mind – how did we get to where we are and how do we overcome this lone state of affairs?

The first is easy. Nature is naturally entropic, i.e. it is self-destructive. We are born to ruin. A body not cared for will decay faster; a garden not tended will suffocate in weeds; a house not looked after will rot; a community not able to care for itself, its people and its processes, will fade; a country or civilization that does not grow, implodes.

The way to counter entropy is conscious effort. The superior human brain is the only instrument that has the ability to be conscious [there may be other conscious beings in the cosmos we are yet not aware of. Consciousness is anti-entropy and pro-evolution. The greater the conscious effort, the more the chances of growth and prosperity.

In our daily lives, how does this work. Let’s say you are over-weight. You know you have not controlled your diet therefore you have reached this uncomfortable state. The doctor has declared you borderline diabetic and hypertensive. Now you wish to lose this weight to be healthy. It takes 30 minutes on the treadmill at 7 kmph to shed the number of calories one can consume in 5 minutes of drinking a cold-drink. Any and every effort you make to lose this weight is called a ‘conscious effort’; effort geared to break habits, to counter impulses, and to stop doing what you ‘want’ to do. Even the putting-on-of-weight was because you did not make a conscious effort about your eating habits. Habits are killers – they are your worst enemy.

Habits are for pleasure and not all pleasure is healthy. If you are not able to control your drive for pleasure, which makes you fat or lazy, then nature’s law of entropy takes over and your health is ruined. Imagine not brushing your teeth or having a bath for a week, what will become of you?

Such consequences are the end result of the scenarios described above; the ills of society. Whether it is the desire not to wait at a traffic light, or to give a bribe to a policeman to avoid a chalaan, corruption starts small, and then there are no limits. The black-and-white of morality start merging and we start justifying our actions. Entropy is justifiable; these are not reasons, they are excuses. Analyzing for reasons is a powerful intellectual exercise; justifications are ego-centric. The more we justify and blame, the bigger the ego grows. That’s when wrongs become the right way to live.

Having adults and seniors not living on integrity adds to the problem. I’ve seen, at school time in the morning, mothers and fathers driving their kids to school and, in their hurry, breaking the red light; people breaking the line at airport security queues, an act of injustice and depriving others of their rights. Thus, our children grow up with a confused mindset. We tell them to be honest and do justice, but demonstrate the opposite. We parents are the role-models of indiscipline in our society. Then why are we perplexed that our kids are poor citizens?

The country’s poverty is an indicator of this indiscipline. Where there are eight children plus grandparents to feed on the salary of two, we are breeding malnourished, weak and survival-only prone people. At times when I mention this factor; the over population that is under-utilized, as one of the causes of our conditions, people’s reaction is, “But this is the only form of entertainment poor people have,” and thus, we endorse and condone the ill. For these many people there aren’t enough jobs or big enough land-holdings to feed, so the increased crime, where one can hire an assassin for a mere Rs 2,500 tops.

Getting to the second question: How do we change our condition? Ultimately, life is pretty simple, we only complicate matters – the answer to this question, too, is easy. Like the oft-repeated Quranic verse that mentions change as being a consequence of self-change, the solution lies in doing the opposite of what we are doing today. Our actions must be reversed for the results to be transformed. Where we lie, we must speak the truth; instead of coming late, we must be on time; stop promising what we will not deliver; not break the queue or the red light; control the birth-rate and let everyone have the right to live a good quality life; respect public property and not spit on or write on walls; value the traditions, customs, religious beliefs of the other instead of bombing them to death or sawing off their heads; listen to each other instead of screaming to be heard above other screamers.

If it is so easy, why can’t we do it? There are two ingredients of the much-needed action. We often hear, at the conclusion of political talk shows that we lack the political Will to act on the solutions we are richly endowed with. Since decades it’s always been the Will that is to blame. In which store, mall or warehouse does one find the Will to make it happen? Where will it come from? Who will bring it and give it to us? Till when do we have to wait to have it? What will happen to us while we are waiting? Who is responsible for us not having the Will? Why don’t we have the Will? What should previous generations have done to ingrain the Will in us? And, if they didn’t do it, what do we have to do today so that future generations have the Will to lead the required change?

Again the answer is simple. There are two ingredients of the Will, patience and humility. Patience comes from empathy and humility comes from gratitude. Lack of empathy is due to plenty of selfishness and lack of gratitude is due to too much greed, which again is selfish. Selfishness is a consequence of fear, which is the basic emotion for survival and, for this purpose, is equal in humans and animals. Fear-ridden societies are either barbaric or decadent. Fear is inversely proportionate to faith. Faith-laden societies are civilized as they have hope and trust that their action will bring results. Fear-full societies have big egos (the pain-body, where it hurts to be kind, gracious and which forces us to do acts of injustice) and will always be dirty, as the ego makes us rigid and does not allow the back to be bent to pick up the garbage. Faith-full societies are less on ego and high on dignity (self-respect) and will be clean, as faith makes us flexible and bendable to ensure what is preached is practiced. The sense of dignity does not allow garbage to lie around; for the mouth to say a lie; for anyone’s right to be abused and for injustice to be committed.

Patience and humility or, in other words, empathy and gratitude, or yet in more words, faith, trust and hope are best inculcated in children till the age of three after which it becomes part of their character enabling them to practice these Godly qualities at the intuitive level. Every year, past this age, these character qualities become more difficult to instill. So we grow up with an Operating System (OS), and even a BIOS, that is devoid of these traits. These get hardwired in us and cannot be changed. As an Adult, we can manage this programming but not alter it. In managing it, we can consciously decide not to do that which we consider wrong but which is a habit. Gradually, this new trained response becomes part of our personality. Yet, anytime we are in a state of panic or respond under conditions of high stress, the old programmed OS will take precedence.

I am not talking about ‘Do or Die’, I insist it is ‘Be or Die’ as to Be is the richness of character – Khudi ko kar buland itna ……. (we all know this). It is not the ‘mai’ – the ‘I’ – it is the ‘khudi’. Therefore it is said, “Having is the substitute of Being,” and, thus, we fill our lives with the material instead of the spiritual – all that we will leave behind in this world and go to our next destination empty-handed.
The choice is ours, as are the consequences we will have to live with.

Being Firm and Fair

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Organizations are often held hostage by aggressive high performers who are great at meeting short term goals through pushing and ordering people around, but that comes at a high cost. Long term viability of any business is adversely affected if such conduct goes unchecked. 

No two people are alike. We have different pasts, experiences and beliefs. We come from different backgrounds and cultures. As individuals each one of us is unique and is motivated by different things; yet, we are alike in many ways….Being able to leverage such diversity is what makes all the difference in performance. Understanding and working with difference is a key challenge for any manager to be effective.

Focus of this article is on managers who have a tendency to be very firm and demanding, with little or no concern for how their outbursts or mindless straightforwardness affects individuals and teams at the receiving end. Such a forthright behavior without tact and sense of timing, no matter how well meaning, harms an otherwise conducive work environment.

Organizations are often held hostage by aggressive high performers who are great at meeting short term goals through pushing and ordering people around, but that comes at a high cost. Long term viability of any business is adversely affected if such conduct goes unchecked.

It is important, however, not to write-off such people as trouble-makers. Instead, it would be worth our while to try and understand where they are coming from and what drives them to extreme behaviors.

Through counseling and coaching, it is quite possible, that ‘rough stones’ can be encouraged to turn themselves into diamonds. Often genuine concern for meeting demanding business objectives lead some managers to express themselves in ways that are unproductive.

Those who are overly aggressive tend to be more firm than fair. This is usually because they know no better. However, when such people ultimately do turn around, and a few do by finding the right balance in their leadership style, they become amazing allies of change and transformation.

In organizations, aggressive people are mostly feared or side-lined. This is largely because managers fail to confront such people with the intent to redirect their energy to a positive end.

How can we harness the energy of aggressive people to achieve business goals on a sustainable basis? Think about it. Why are some people aggressive and intolerant? Is this a habit? Or do events trigger an unreasonable behavior in them? When a subordinate explodes on another colleague in the office, in the presence of many, why do their bosses not attend to it promptly and effectively?

There can be many reasons for this, but one thing is clear, the answer to why we behave the way we do, lies in our past. The clues to our present behaviors can be traced back to when we were born, right through to the present time. However, the first seven to ten years of our lives are most significant. These early years can be likened to wet cement, where whatever falls on it, leaves a lasting impression, unless the matter is addressed there and then. Experts in the field of psychology maintain that our most qualified and competent teachers should be teaching in primary schools. This is the time when children are more impressionable. However, despite this knowledge, we live in a land where primary schools teachers are the least qualified and competent, and where parenting is neglected.

Erik Erikson, is known to be a giant developmental theorist. He suggests that we experience inner conflicts as we progress through life. How they get resolved along the way has a significant bearing to our present conduct. The following table is reproduced from the chapter on “The Socialization Process” from a book titled Child Development by John Santrock and Steven Yussen. It highlights the different stages through which we evolve and the inner conflicts we face:

Erikson’s Stages of Development

Late adulthood (51+) Ego, Integrity vs despair
Middle adulthood (31-50) Generativity vs stagnation
Young adulthood (21-30) Intimacy vs isolation
Adolescence (16-20) Identity vs role confusion
Middle and late childhood (11-15) Industry vs inferiority
Early childhood (3-10) Initative vs guiltAutonomy vs shame, doubt
Infancy (0-2) Basic trust vs mistrust

Based on the table above, the sources of aggression can be traced to our infancy and early childhood. For example, if a manager is behaving aggressively, it is quite possible that during childhood, he did not enjoy sufficient freedom to do things on his own and as a result started doubting his own abilities. When anyone uses excessive force to get things done, it could be because the idea is weak. Aggressive people tend to defend weak ideas.

In light of the foregoing, it becomes vital for managers to acquire in-depth knowledge about their colleagues and subordinates in an informal setting. Effective information exchange can take place only in a climate of trust. Without building and enjoying a good rapport with team mates, our efforts to coach or counsel falls by the way side. In fact our attempts to help can also be counter-productive.

Similarly, intolerance stems from us not trusting the process or people we work with. It’s our heightened sense of insecurity that makes it difficult for us to accept anything that is different from status quo i.e., we choose to cling to our comfort zone, and abhor contrarian thinking.

Habit is what we do repeatedly, without applying conscious thought to it. What lies dormant in our subconscious mind often gets triggered through events. For example, the sight of lizards gives some people the creeps – a response that is also a habit. When things are not done as told, some managers sense a loss of power – they feel insecure and behave aggressively.

There could be many reasons for why bosses hold back. It could either be their tactic or strategy of allowing time for things to simmer down. But this is usually not the case. Some bosses are slow in addressing difficult people and situations largely because of fear or apathy or lack of skill. In some ways, this behavior can be viewed as ‘Passive’, which is the other extreme of aggressive. Both ‘Passive’ and ‘Aggressive’ behaviors are acquired from our past experiences, particularly our early childhood.

Passive behavior is characterized by our failure to express our wants and needs honestly. Tendency to allow others to disregard our rights is also very evident in ‘passive’ individuals. On the other hand, aggressive people usually tend to only concern themselves with their own rights and privileges, and that too, at all costs, having no regard for the rights and feelings of others.

There are no easy answers, but as a pointer, seriously consider coaching and counseling. Coaching is for skills enhancement, where the coachee is usually keen to learn. Counseling, on the other hand, is for addressing attitudinal issues and as such can be very time-consuming at first. A company would be in real trouble if most of its people were in need of counseling.

Before you embark on a coaching strategy in your organization, it will be worth your while investigating how attuned your managers are to the subject. Ask them to share their perspectives on:

    • What is coaching?
    • How does one get a “buy-in” for coaching?
    • What actions does a coach need to take?
    • How is feedback provided to improve performance?
    • How does one coach someone who knows more than the coach?
    • What are the payoffs for the coach and the company?

Coaching and mentoring strategies are increasingly being welcomed by top companies to get the best out of people. The benefits show that coaching:

  • Makes a marked difference to performance
  • Gets even a beginner to perform competently and quickly
  • Turns an average performer into someone with real strengths
  • Best performers, too, need a coach to help them stretch themselves to become even better

In addition to becoming a better coach, most managers need to concentrate on becoming assertive, which is a delicate balancing act.

By being assertive, managers can deal with conflicts intelligently, facilitate positive changes in peoples’ behaviors, negotiate effectively with a variety of internal and external constituents, and lead the growth agenda of the organization, while keeping all stakeholders committed through the journey.

Assertiveness is a skill that can be learned to counter our inherited tendency to either be aggressive or passive.